I am just frustrated with my country and most of its people these days.
I am not gay nor am I getting married so I just don't give a shit about who can get married or not. I honestly don't think anyone should get married these days. Love shouldn't be bound by a piece of paper.
I also think that it isn't 1862 and I don't live in the South. I don't give a shit about flags. I really don't. If it offends you, get over it. Strong odors offend me, you don't hear me bitching about that.
Good grief people.
There is so many other things that should be a concern other than what other people are doing or what offends them.
I work hard everyday. I like what I do. I don't complain about bruises and tired arms. What bothers me is that I what I make per hour isn't even enough to throw me over the poverty level. I also don't qualify for aid or help. I have kids to support and bills to pay.
Why can't we fix that? Why can't we have poor people parades? Why can't poor people wave a freaking flag?
Don't even get me started on affordable health care. I pay for my health insurance and I also have medical bills thanks to my affordable health care. I would like to hear a valid definition of what is considered "affordable".
Seriously...
America has so many homeless people. America has so many unemployed.
I see so many kids these days post with poor grammar and spelling. They can't do basic math. I don't even think they learn history to even understand the issues today and where they stem from.
Why can we fix that?
Crazies are toting guns into places and shooting whoever they please. I hear cries of gun control. What about controlling the crazies?
Why does this happen? Where is the flag for that? How about a parade?
Why does no one really care about the important things?
I honestly think our priorities are in the wrong places.
So I've been unemployed for about a week now. The novelty of staying home has worn off and I am beginning to climb the walls. I have watched enough Law and Order SVU to actually solve a murder, try the perp and sentence him/her to the appropriate amount of time for the crime.
Thank God I haven't started in with soap operas and game shows.
Lately I've been working on my crafts (while watching Law and Order) and making wonderful things with wire, beads and hair clips. It takes hours to come up with a few things since I have the equivalency of writer's block.
sigh
I've signed up on job service websites. I cruise those to see what's out there. I giggle as I refrain from applying for a detective or something legal like a lawyer. I can't put Law and Order on my resume.
I also have been thinking about working for myself.
What could I do that would pay the bills and that I would enjoy?
I think of all those designers out there that design shoes, handbags, jewelry, hats, and other things. I design barrettes and bangles for cell phones. How do other designers get noticed? How do they design and then mass produce it? hrrmmmmmm....
So many questions....
I have a friend who is a travel writer. She travels and writes. I would love to do something like that but I don't think I am that great of a writer nor can I just pick up and leave with kids. I just live through her writings and pretend that I went with her.
So much goes through my mind as Eliot and Olivia (reruns) solve crimes.
How will I pay the bills? How will we eat?
I need to figure something out.
How do others find jobs that they enjoy? I haven't enjoyed a job since I worked at Walmart. (I know, right?) I loved working with people. I loved supervising cashiers. I loved little old ladies who couldn't find the right TV. I loved the fast paced holiday season. It didn't pay well, but I loved it.
My second favorite job of all time was working as a hostess in a local restaurant when I was a teenager. I think I made $4.50 an hour but I loved it. I loved the customers. I loved my co-workers (Hell, I even married one of them). I loved the holiday seasons. I loved the smell of ribs cooking.
I guess the theme here is that I loved the two jobs that didn't pay the greatest but where I could work with people (customers).
So, maybe I have my answer just by writing all this out.
hrrmmmmmm......
I've been in Ninja Insurance Warrior Boot Camp for most of the week. I am training to be a Ninja Insurance Warrior. I need to complete this in order to get my super ability to indemnify people.
I am dead serious.
I have actually written several blog entries but haven't been able to post them. I wrote mostly about my feelings about my mom's death. It has been incredibly hard to write about since my emotions are all over the board and my writing reflect it.
I talked with my step dad tonight and he said that he has been yelling at my mom for leaving him. I can relate. I have wanted to yell many times at her. She left us too soon and she is mostly to blame for being stubborn and careless with her health. It makes me angry that she isn't around any more and will miss out on so many things.
Yeah, I know you might be thinking that she will be around anyway but to us living people it isn't the same as having her participate without popping up in a ghostly fashion.
Back to my training.
A couple of months ago I decided to make some changes. I needed to leave the profession I was in. I wasn't satisfied and I wasn't too happy about co-workers causing drama. I was stressed about mom being sick. Something had to give, so I left my job and took one at an insurance agency. I will be a licensed professional.
I went from working in a highly corporate (world headquarters) environment in which I had to watch what I said and did to working in a very relaxed environment with two people. It has been pretty darn cool and my stress level is way down. My stress cough is pretty much gone.
yay!
I knew I wasn't happy so I did something about it.
Even though change completely terrifies me, I did it.
yay again!
Courage comes from within.
