I am just frustrated with my country and most of its people these days.
I am not gay nor am I getting married so I just don't give a shit about who can get married or not. I honestly don't think anyone should get married these days. Love shouldn't be bound by a piece of paper.
I also think that it isn't 1862 and I don't live in the South. I don't give a shit about flags. I really don't. If it offends you, get over it. Strong odors offend me, you don't hear me bitching about that.
Good grief people.
There is so many other things that should be a concern other than what other people are doing or what offends them.
I work hard everyday. I like what I do. I don't complain about bruises and tired arms. What bothers me is that I what I make per hour isn't even enough to throw me over the poverty level. I also don't qualify for aid or help. I have kids to support and bills to pay.
Why can't we fix that? Why can't we have poor people parades? Why can't poor people wave a freaking flag?
Don't even get me started on affordable health care. I pay for my health insurance and I also have medical bills thanks to my affordable health care. I would like to hear a valid definition of what is considered "affordable".
Seriously...
America has so many homeless people. America has so many unemployed.
I see so many kids these days post with poor grammar and spelling. They can't do basic math. I don't even think they learn history to even understand the issues today and where they stem from.
Why can we fix that?
Crazies are toting guns into places and shooting whoever they please. I hear cries of gun control. What about controlling the crazies?
Why does this happen? Where is the flag for that? How about a parade?
Why does no one really care about the important things?
I honestly think our priorities are in the wrong places.
I haven't blogged in awhile.
My laptop took a crap and I am using my son's, which isn't the easiest to use. As I type, the cursor moves around and typos happen.
I also haven't had much to say. Who wants to hear about my adventures in fondling tomatoes and inspecting bananas?
Anyway....
This time of year is graduation. It is a happy time for families and students.
As I scrolled through my Facebook feed the other day I came across a photo of my aunt and uncle with their granddaughter. I teared up suddenly. My aunt looks so much like my mother. The same salt and pepper hair, the same shape face. I starred at the photo. My cousin's daughter reminds me of my own with long brown hair and a wide smile. I cried.
My mother died a few years ago from lung cancer. I never really sobbed over it. I don't think I grieved like you would imagine what grieving would be like. It is weird and hard to explain. I just expected to break down but I never did.
Back to the photo...
I think my tears came from anger. I am angry at my mom for dying. It is such a raw and real emotion. It came from just picturing my own mother and daughter on Kate's graduation day. This will never happen.
I used to think my mom would be around to share in my children's life events.
I think what angers me the most is that she was so selfish to not see a doctor sooner or to take better care of herself. She admitted that she hadn't seen a doctor of 17 years prior to the cancer diagnosis.
Maybe is a normal feeling to be angry.
I also think I am thinking more of missing my mother because I have been through some rough times over the last couple of years. There are times I wish I could just call her. She had a way of talking you off the ledge and give you a sense that everything will be ok.
Sigh...
